Thursday, March 7, 2013

confessions of an extended housewife

You know you’ve been a housewife for too long when;

The idea of shopping for a feather duster thrills you more than the normal amount of feather duster accumulation should.

Not finding said feather duster at the store saddens you more than the normal amount of disappointment in failing to do so should.

Other strange objects that you’ve taken for granted in life seem to excite you, and it takes a while before this starts concerning you.  Yellow gloves are a good example. Ironing tips are another.

There’s a difference in starting out as a career housewife, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that.  I might have taken on this role differently if I didn’t start out with the mentality that it’s going to be temporary.

A few weeks of making healthy meals and folding socks and scrubbing toilets as my main form of a productive day and then on to … uhm, you know, like a career or something.  No really, I had anticipated some free time and then on with it.

Of course I understand that healthy meals still need to be made daily, socks will always require pairing and folding and that toilet will not keep it self clean. Surely these daily tasks find their own way into the new routine of a working couple. That’s a concern for another day.

It’s the few weeks that have so effortlessly turned themselves into months that gets me.
Steadily moving on to half a year in a few weeks and what will have become of me.  A feather-duster-less desperate housewife. 

Simply answering conversation-starting well-meaning questions like ‘so what do you do’ and ‘what do you want to do’ are a strange cause for anxiety. While the poor inquirer is just making small talk, I’m near hyperventilation.

Usually what I need is a little self slap across the face, some lipstick and a silent war cry to overcome these strange occurrences. Well, that and some perspective of the bigger picture and a constant reminder to stay in the moment.

I have this inkling that I’ll look back on a post like this when I’m a new mom and just roll my eyes at myself. So to future mom self:  “Stop rolling your eyes at me and continue writing about the challenges you’re facing now”.

It just dawned on me that, all this strange emotion flying around the page might not be due to be being a new housewife, but more about being unemployed. And this friend, is a term I’ve wanted to stay away from for quite some time.

 So there, a little bit more personal, less snarky post for today.  Unemployed and keeping it real since 2012. 
Once the Green Card comes through I will legally be able to look for work, and it does seem like I should receive notice of my interview soon. So it shouldn't be too long now. #hope

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